Why are men (and some women) obsessed with what's going on in their trousers? At the end of the day, an impressive pecker can only keep you so warm at night, although that hasn't stopped men boasting about the size of their manhood.
As we recently said, it's not the size of it, it's what you do with it. After all, a lump hammer isn't necessarily the best tool for hanging a picture in your home.
Still, as we saw from some celebrating the supposed side effect of 'Ozempic penis' and apparent 'growth spurt' in the United Kingdom, some spend longer than you'd think worrying about what's hanging out down there.
Is it really any surprise when the porn industry spends much of its time waving such massive members in our faces? LADbible's 'For F**k's Sake' campaign states that 77% of Gen Z internet users admit to watching pornography, and with most 'big d*ck' porn featuring penises that are 32% longer than the average erect one, we might be getting a skewed vision of reality.
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An interactive map from World Population Review revealed the countries with the biggest average penis length when erect, and if size really does matter, some of you might be booking a last-minute holiday to the Democratic Republic of Congo or Sudan.
That same report claimed that the average erect penis size in the USA is 5.6 inches when erect, although that's based on self-reported information. Returning to the Land of Hope and Glory, it turns out that individual states have varying girths and lengths, so it's time to whip out your maps and your manhood.
According to Bespoke Surgical, there are some 'big' differences across the board.
There are some obvious questions because the submissions were self-reported, and we imagine some men are thinking, "What's a few centimeters between friends?" Still, 13000 men across the USA have waved their wands.
Which US states have the biggest average penis size?
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The study claims that Alabama comes in with a whopping 7.44 inches, which is a whole 0.34 inches more than World Population Review, declaring the Democratic Republic of Congo or Sudan have colossal choppers. Up next, Louisiana is said to be packing with 7.15 inches, West Virginia whacked it out with 7.00 inches, and the Top 5 is rounded off by Vermont (6.98) and Utah (6.97).
We'd also like to note that Bespoke Surgical's claims that the average erect penis length in the USA is 6.41 inches, which is quite some way off World Population Review's 5.6 inches.
A second question asks what men tell others their penis size is, with a national average being an exaggerated 6.61 inches.
For those of you whose noses are growing like Pinocchio's, Louisiana had the biggest exaggeration, as its residents apparently claim their penises are standing to attention at 8.07 inches. It was also one of the widest variances (0.92 inches) based on the actual size.
Which US states have the smallest average penis size?
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Figures state that most states fell between a still impressive 6 and 6.9 inches, although there are some on the other end of the spectrum.
We'd again like to reiterate that size isn't everything, but according to the survey, Delaware has the lowest average erect penis at 5.22 inches. New Mexico takes second with 5.36 inches, followed by Maryland (5.50), Georgia (5.69), and Rhode Island (5.83).
Out of all 50 states, only eight reported averages below 6 inches. Still, Delaware also had the biggest average exaggeration of 1.30 inches.
A 2020 research paper suggested that the average erect penis length is between 5.1 and 5.6 inches, but Bespoke Surgical explains why so many others claim it's 6 inches. The health practice says that men with larger penises might be more likely to volunteer for this kind of survey, while also highlighting the aforementioned issue of self-reported measurements being exaggerated.
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Okay lads, time to put it away!