How a simple phone setting quickly became known as 'affair mode'
It's fair to say that smartphones have changed how we approach modern relationships.
Dating apps like Tinder have made finding a partner easier (or more problematic) than ever before, while the phenomenon of phubbing has become a recognised relationship strain in its own right.
But as our pocket-friendly devices have made cheating more accessible, they have also made it easier to identify.
For Kerry, a woman based in Los Angeles, it was the sudden disappearance of entire message threads from her partner's phone that first raised her suspicions.
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"He deleted everything on his phone," she told the Daily Mail. But as he rushed to cover his tracks: "He forgot about his iPad on the nightstand."
When Kerry opened it, she found months of conversations that had vanished from his phone including late-night plans and secret restaurant reservations. It seems more philanderers are relying on disappearing messages and hidden digital settings, known as 'affair mode' to cover up their infidelity.
To make it worse, the other woman turned out to be her best friend from high school.
"I found a shared Google Doc between him and my best friend from high school," Kerry revealed. "It had everything… messages, plans, what they were going to do together, pics. I sat there scrolling[...] It was all planned out, right in front of me. How could I be so dumb?"
Turns out, Kerry's partner had activated the 'disappearing messages' setting in his WhatsApp, which deletes conversations after a set period.
Weighing in on the matter, tech expert Kim Komando explained that this setting is known as 'affair mode' and is one of the most common ways people hide activity on their phones.
One tactic involves disguised apps, such as Calculator Pro+, Calculator Vault, and Secret Calculator, Komando said.
They are designed to look just like the phone's regular calculator, but entering a specific PIN can open up a hidden stash of photos, a messaging app or a secret call log.
While Kerry's partner was able to hide his messages on WhatsApp, iPhone's dedicated Messages app syncs across devices which is why she was able to find them on his iPad.
"He was using WhatsApp so nothing would stick," she added.
Beyond disappearing messages, there are other secretive ways to be aware of. Notifications from specific contacts can be silenced so nothing flashes up on the screen when a message arrives, and individual chats can be locked behind Face ID or a PIN code, meaning even if the app is discovered, the contents will be hidden. Apps can also be hidden from the home screen entirely. For example, by pressing and holding an app icon on the iPhone, tapping Remove App, and selecting Remove from Home Screen, the app is still installed but hidden from view.
Of course, everyone values privacy differently, so not every one of these features automatically points to any wrongdoing. If you are worried that your partner is up to something sneaky, it's probably best to have an honest conversation about it.